4 Ways to Lessen Impacts of Trauma
Trauma - HOT keyword for today’s news...because it is everywhere.
How the H-E-double hockey sticks do we deal with that?
How do we cope with trauma?
First, we have to acknowledge trauma. Big “T” trauma AND little “t” trauma.
Second, we have to educate ourselves on what to do when we acknowledge the trauma.
Sometimes you don’t know how to determine what trauma is vs. growing up in a “normal” family. It might mean you say “Hey that class sounds interesting” and the universe teaches you what some new word (or words) means and...BAM!
Now you understand that YOU have had trauma!
The universe was probably telling you that before you wandered into a random class...but were you listening? I’m going with no on this one.
So then you hear it again and you still don’t listen...or maybe that was just me the universe smacked in the back of the head.
Recently I attended a Trauma-Informed Workshop at Blue Mountain Yoga. The owner Diane provided the neurological explanation for how our body and mind react to trauma.It reminded me of days in biology class with diagrams and explanations of nerves, body parts, and the ways exterior stimuli impacted internal responses.
(Can you see my geek flag flying?)
So of course I wanted to share with you what I learned and how I plan to use this information going forward. (And encourage you to join a workshop at Blue Mountain Yoga in the near future.)
I learned a simple definition of trauma: an event that emits a stress response (acute or chronic). This is typically something outside our control or that we feel we have no control over.
I was able to see trauma as something that didn’t have to be extreme mental or physical trauma. Honestly, until this class, I could only see trauma as a major life-changing event (accident, death, losing your home, etc.). A car wreck is also a form of trauma even if it is not life-threatening.
It could be as little as the work platform you use taking its sweet time getting from one thing to the next; or closing randomly during the day.
If I had a quarter for every time I stopped short of saying that phrase that sounds like mother trucker but doesn’t have anything to do with a truck…I would be a mother trucking millionaire!
I mean, you guys that know me, know the strange relationship I have with technology. So, by the end of an 8-12 hour day of computer work, I owe a lot of money to the swear jar.
This workshop helped me see how all those little things (network issues, late reminders, unsolicited phone calls, clocking applications, etc.) keep your adrenal system in an overproduction of cortisol. You will likely stop noticing this feeling before your body is beyond the chemical stage of the experience. (AKA dealing with all that cortisol- how is it getting out of your system and when.)
Looking at how often we have these events each day and the slow speed in which our body processes the cortisol, I realized why I was always tired. I was always in that trauma recovery state and I’m sure I’m not the only one.
How many people do you know impacted by virtual school in the last year and a half? Of that number how many were full-time workers for an employer? Or how many small business owners? Our sanity was (probably still is) on the line.
So, back to the original question.
How the H-E-double hockey sticks do we deal with that?
Notice what happens to your body. You probably have a very noticeable “tell” that your body exhibits when you are in this response mode. Typically this is based on heart rate, breathing, body temperature can change.
Find a way to slow down your response and make it intentional. We talked about mudras and hand gestures that hold special meaning for you. Benefits of breathwork and how to use your breath to focus, soothe, and reset your system was very evident.
When there has been trauma, most often one is triggered when there is an atmosphere of perceived judgments, lack of security, and violated boundaries. How we interact with someone that has trauma can be determined by something as small as offering a seat at the table versus telling them to sit down. Small but VERY powerful difference.
If you are dealing with your own trauma the information in the next paragraph can help you vocalize what you need to feel safe. If you are one on the other side in the supporting role, this can help you to know what is needed from you.
Trauma-informed words and actions to change your interactions:
Increased compassion for yourself and others.
Put the comparison menace outside and lock the door.
Today you might do more or less than other days and that is ok.
Remember to offer choices rather than tell someone what to do.
Feel free to have a seat or stand for the meeting, whatever makes you comfortable.
I invite you to take a deep breath and close your eyes or find a place where you can focus your attention.
Make sure you are only touching when invited or when you have permission.
Do you want a hug?
Is it ok if I sit next to you?
Create a space that provides feelings of security and safety.
Some of this is through music, lighting, and speech in this space.
This space could be the only time/place that you can connect with your body without self-judgment, shame, or fear.
The workshop provided us with knowledge, techniques, and time to reflect on how trauma has impacted our journey in life. We were also encouraged to think about how we interact with others (family, friends, clients, students, etc) that might have trauma we don’t know about. (Pretty much everyone has it even if they haven’t come to terms with it.) Diane walked us through ways to get back to a regulated state and move away from a deregulated state.
I plan to take all that I learned and apply it to my daily interaction. Kindness and caring will get us far in this world. Today I encourage you to be kind to yourself, be kind to others, and consider what can make those you interact with feel safe and comfortable.
Peace and love,
Teresea
Photo credits: Unsplash; Lee Wright
